When a child is struggling with behavior at school, it can be stressful and emotional for the entire family.

Parents may receive phone calls, incident reports, or notices about disciplinary actions without fully understanding what happened, why it happened, or what supports are available to help their child.

For children with disabilities, behavior should not always be viewed simply as a problem to punish.

Behavior can be a form of communication.

A child may be struggling with communication, sensory needs, emotional regulation, academic demands, changes in routine, or other challenges. Understanding why a behavior is happening can be an important step toward finding appropriate support.

This page provides general, parent-friendly educational information about behavior and school discipline.

When behavioral concerns arise, it can be helpful to look beyond the behavior itself.

Parents may want to consider:

• What happened before the behavior occurred?
• Has anything changed in the child's routine or environment?
• Is the child struggling academically?
• Could communication difficulties be involved?
• Are sensory needs or emotional regulation challenges playing a role?
• What happens after the behavior occurs?
• Are there patterns parents and school staff are noticing?

Parents know their children in different environments. What you observe at home may provide valuable information when discussing concerns with the school.

An FBA, or Functional Behavioral Assessment, is a process used to gather information about a student's behavior and help identify why the behavior may be occurring.

The process may involve looking at:

• When and where the behavior occurs
• What happens before the behavior
• What the behavior looks like
• What happens afterward
• Possible reasons or functions of the behavior

The purpose is to better understand the behavior so the team can consider appropriate supports and interventions.

• What information is being collected?
• Are there patterns in when the behavior occurs?
• What may be triggering or contributing to the behavior?
• What does the team believe the child is communicating or trying to accomplish through the behavior?
• How will the results be used to support my child?
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A BIP, or Behavior Intervention Plan, is a plan designed to provide strategies and supports to address a student's behavioral needs.

A plan may include:

• Positive supports and strategies
• Ways to teach replacement behaviors or skills
• Environmental supports
• Staff responses to specific behaviors
• Methods for monitoring progress

A behavior plan should be based on the individual needs of the student.

Parents may want to ask:

• What supports will be provided?
• Who is responsible for implementing the plan?
• How will staff know whether the plan is working?
• How will progress be monitored?
• When will the plan be reviewed?

A school removal may occur when a student is removed from their regular educational setting for disciplinary reasons.

Depending on the student's individual circumstances, disability status, and the number and type of removals, additional protections and procedures may apply.

Because these situations can become complicated, it is important for parents to:

📝 Keep records of every disciplinary incident and removal.

📅 Track dates and the number of days your child has been removed from school.

📄 Save incident reports, notices, emails, and other communication.

🗣️ Ask questions if you do not understand what is happening or why.

If your child is facing repeated removals or significant disciplinary action, consider reviewing your child's educational records and seeking appropriate professional guidance.

An MDR, or Manifestation Determination Review, is a meeting that may be required in certain disciplinary situations involving eligible students with disabilities.

The purpose generally involves reviewing relevant information to determine whether the behavior in question was connected to the student's disability or whether it resulted from a failure to implement the student's IEP.

Because MDRs involve specific legal requirements and individual circumstances, parents should carefully review any information provided by the school and ask questions when they need clarification.

• What information will the team review?
• Which records and documents are being considered?
• How was the behavior connected—or not connected—to my child's disability?
• Was my child's IEP being implemented as written?
• Were all relevant supports and services in place?

Documentation can help parents keep track of important information over time.

Consider keeping a record of:

• The date and time of each incident
• Where the incident occurred
• What the school reported happened
• Who was involved
• Any disciplinary action taken
• Communication from school staff
• Changes you noticed at home
• Questions or concerns you have

When possible, keep copies of written communication and documents in one organized location.

Documentation is not about assuming the worst. It is about keeping an accurate record and helping you see the bigger picture.

When behavior or discipline is discussed, parents may consider asking:

• What happened before the behavior occurred?
• What supports were in place at the time?
• Were my child's accommodations and services being provided?
• Are there patterns in the incidents?
• What positive supports are being considered?
• How will the school help prevent similar situations in the future?
• How will we communicate about my child's progress?

Write down the answers and ask for clarification if something is unclear.

It can be difficult to receive calls or reports saying that your child is struggling at school.

Take a moment to gather information before making assumptions.

Ask questions.

Review the facts.

Keep records.

Share what you know about your child.

And remember that you are an important member of your child's educational team.

Your child's behavior is only one part of their story. Every child deserves to be understood, supported, and treated with dignity.

Visit our other parent resources:

📚 Understanding Special Education
Learn about common terms and processes.

🗂️ Parent Advocacy Toolkit
Find practical tools to help you organize records, concerns, and meetings.

🌱 My Advocacy Education
Learn about my continuing journey in special-education advocacy.

🤝 Parent Support Services
Learn about parent-to-parent educational support.

The information provided by Akleema's World is for general educational and informational purposes and parent-to-parent support. I am not an attorney and do not provide legal advice or legal representation. Special-education requirements and procedures depend on individual circumstances and applicable laws. Parents with legal questions or concerns should consider consulting a qualified attorney or other appropriate professional.